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Management is now hiring a handwriting expert.
Submitted by: dunno source via Submission Page
If you have time to put water in the pot, how about actually making a fresh pot of coffee?
Thanks,
MgmtPlease direct me to mgmt.
You have too much free time on your hands. Now get back to work!
-X
(We couldn’t show the mustard—it had the ol’ goatse across it.)
Submitted by: C. Dekany via Submission Page
Friday is a day for cleansing, for Brutal Honesty. Brutal, cleansing fire.
Submitted by: Jonny via Submission Page
Or, Mr. Creepy, 12 people each took 1 muffin and everyone in the office hates you. Have a nice Thursday!
Submitted by: Andrew Farrell/Hannibal Tabu via Submission Page
Wait, they allow burritos in Utah?
Submitted by: dunno source via Submission Page
To the Person who stole my Burrito.
Yours must be a truly unfortunate life to steal from someone currently receiving foodstamps from the Utah gov’t because their current wage is insufficient to cover their living expenses, tuition, and food. I will now go hungry today as I’m at the limit of my budget for this week.
It is my sincere wish that you burn in a lake of boiling cheese and refried beans not dissimilar to those found in my burrito. There you would dwell for a thousand years, with your skin constantly regenerating so that you can feel it being burned off your body yet again.
Sincerely,
Burrito LessTL;DR I hate you.
DUH. Don’t half-ass it though! Remember what I said about foreskins?
Submitted by: dunno source via http://mthruf.com/submit
BEWARE
One of your coworkers is a thief and so completely lazy that they stole my sandwich. They stole a HOMEMADE sandwich. Who steals food in the first place? And honestly, who steals a non-packaged product? Do you really want something someone else handled?
From now on, I suggest everyone sneezes on and profusely licks their food prior to bringing it to work.
I know I will.
Karma will find you.
It’s Friday, bring on the bourbon! See? Even your computer’s got the spirit. Ooooh, it just called you a lightweight pussy, too.
Submitted by: Steve via Submission Page
Cheer up, little guy. At least he isn’t farting.
Oh, he is? Holy moly you must have done some messed up ish in a past life. Ever have any flashbacks about burning down orphanages for sport, something like that?
Submitted by: dunno source via Submission Page
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