Submitted by: McMacHack
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The Water Cooler
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STOP THINKING FOR YOURSELVES!!!!
A poster designed to lower employee morale, increase turnover, and ensure mediocre results.
A.K.A.: What is wrong with (primarily corporate) America. Please keep this sort of thing from spreading, in the interest of all of us.
It basically comes down to “I have an MBA and in order to justify my inflated self-worth and insanely high salary I demand absolute control over my minions, and if anything goes wrong, I can blame them and get a fat bonus when I fire you.”
All that crap about how you are all on a big team, or part of a family is BS. Do what you are told, when you are told. Creative thinking or striving to rise above and do outstanding work will not be tolerated! Because you will make the people above you look like the tards they really are and will reveal they have their position because they were related to someone even higher up the chain.
Yeah, maybe. Or, “I’ve been doing this job for 20 years and know how it works better than you so shut up and do your job the way I said already.”
Having suggestions is one thing but the idea that everyone is a special flower who needs to find their own way of doing things without understanding the whole picture just causes a big mess.
This is the kind of sign you need when you are such a bad manager that you can only attract incompetent workers.
Our Goal is to be sub-par.
We strive for mediocrity.
Funny stuff, remind me of my highschool football coach who used to tell me, “Everytime you think, you hurt this team.” (I learned never give an explanation for a missed assignment with “I thought…”).
From “Caine Mutiny” (IIRC):
There’s four ways to do things in the Navy: the right way, the wrong way, the Navy way, and MY way. On this ship things will be done MY way.
Think for yourselves on your own time, slackers.
The back story to this post. 5 years ago I was the Warehouse Manager at a Moving Company during a Summer. During this time the place I worked for was assembling Office Furniture and Cubicles for all of the corporate buildings in town. The furniture and cubicles were supposed to be easy to put together as long as you followed the instructions and used common sense. However we had a bunch of temporary help at the time that were essentially shaved apes. The Temps kept breaking desk, office chairs and cubicle walls because they wouldn’t follow instructions and were trying to do things worthy of “There I Fixed It”. So I got pissed off and put this sign up because telling them everyday to “Not Break Shit” wasn’t enough. Anyway I quit working there shortly after that, and when I stopped in at that moving company a few weeks ago to get some boxes, and to my surprise the boss had left that sign for all of these years.
Amusing. O.K., you win—sometimes not thinking DOES make more sense. I guess I am just a victim of those cases i
You note that assembly was “SUPPOSED TO BE easy to put together as long as you followed the instructions and used common sense [emphasis mine]”. I assume that was true for those who stayed around long enough, or actually did follow the instructions. In my experience, some instructions are good, others really hard to follow—it must be frustrating as a manager to have the good sort, and people still breaking stuff. Belated sympathy—and kudos for a sign that worked.
A 25 year old college educated idiot wants to tell me , with 30 years on this job, how to do it????????????????
See above posts.